As you go through your day, are you aware of how you’re acting? No, I’m not talking about performing your favorite scene from Romeo and Juliet, I’m talking about how you’re coping with what happens to you and around you through the day. When something happens you have a choice to be reactive or proactive.
A lot of times, being reactive to a situation is the norm. When you react to something you’re not in control; the very act of reacting is the result of a stimulus in your life, cause and effect. When you’re reacting, you’re living your life through your emotions. You’re allowing circumstance to drive your decisions. This is where the seed of victim thinking is planted and springs to life. Your focus is on the problem, how it’s affecting you, and how unfair it is. Many times being reactive is caused by being so engrossed in doing things or being so checked out that you don’t see what’s happening around you....
When you’re in the groove everything just seems to be going right. You feel great and you’re achieving great things. You’re on fire and loving life. If you’re not careful, you’ll end up turning that groove into a rut. You don’t want to be in a rut. This is where each day is filled with mind-numbing activities and the only goal you have is to make it to the end of the day or to the weekend. Where are you today? You in the groove or in a rut? Being the curious guy I am, I decided to dig into this and figure out what causes each and how to turn the rut back into a groove.
I discovered that when you’re in a rut you’re focused on the activities of the day. You’re focused on what you’re doing. The monotony of performing the same tasks every day has put you in a trance and you’re drifting. This is a sad state to be in because you’re allowing your present moment of disengagement to become your past.
Your life is the way it is because of one very simple thing. The meaning you give to what happens to you determines the quality of your life. If you want a better life, you need to see these events from a different perspective.
The greatest lesson I ever received on perspective was from my grandson Brandon when he was four years old. One day he and I were playing in his room, sitting on the floor and racing his little cars on this rug that had roads in its’ design. When all of a sudden he laid down on the floor and continued to roll his car around the rug.
“Brandon, are you tired?”, I asked.
“No, Papa.”, he answered.
“Then why are you laying down?”, I inquired.
“Because it’s different.”, was his reply.
So, I tried laying down too and the whole landscape changed. Instead of looking down at the rug and cars, now I was looking at the side of the car and the rug. The change in perspective was...
Have you ever been around someone that made you feel like the most important person in the whole world? Someone that you love to be around because your day is brighter because of them? If you step back and observe, you’ll find that you’re attracted to them like metal to a magnet. What you’re seeing isn’t magic, it’s a mindset and it’s a game changer for the those that can master it.
What they do is put the needs of others before their own needs. I know this sounds counterintuitive but hear me out. When you’re thinking of yourself first, everything you do is with the thought of what you can get. Your thoughts and sentences start with me or I. And then there’s the sense of fairness that comes with a self-serving attitude where you count everything you do for others and demand that you get at least as much in return. You do this in business and in relationships. I know what’s best for my customer, so they should do it. Or,...
What are you doing each day? I think this is a great question that every manager, leader, and owner needs to ask themselves many times throughout their day. Why? Because it’s so easy to fall into the trap of getting the work of the day completed that you get stuck in doing it mode. Doing it is a focus on what’s happening right now, getting the work out, making it to the end of the day. This is a trap because doing business doesn’t grow business.
Are your sales down? Is your schedule full? What are you doing to prospect for new business? Not comfortable prospecting? What about marketing your business? How are you differentiating what you do from others? How about finding great help? Feel like they aren’t out there? The standard response to each of these issues is the same; you complain about customers not buying, being slow, being the same as everyone else, and about the lack of quality help. The problem isn’t any of these; the problem is you.
Occasionally I’m asked why I write about the subjects I do on this blog. “Rick, you’re a business coach. Why don’t you write about business issues on your blog?” That is exactly what I am doing, let me explain why. There has been a secret around for thousands of years that seems to pop its little head up every once in a while. This secret is so astoundingly simple and yet effective that you’d think everyone would know about it and be using it. But that’s not the case. I think because it’s so simple, this secret is dismissed as mumbo jumbo. Do that at your own risk though. The secret is there is more power in your thoughts than you can conceive.
There are quotes throughout the ages that support this secret.
Your imagination is such a gift. Besides your thumbs, it’s what separates you from every other species on this planet. Every other living animal is hard-wired to react to their environment. You, however, have the ability to create your environment and it all starts with your imagination. What you dream about, desire, and think about eventually becomes your reality.
For many, the word imagination is centered around children. “Oh, he has such a vivid imagination!” or “What do you mean you’re bored? You have a room full of toys, now go and use your imagination and have some fun!”. But then something funny happens. As you grew up, the joy of imagining morphed into daydreaming, which became fantasizing and matured into wishful thinking. How many times did you hear, “Get your head out of the clouds! You’re an adult now, you don’t have time to indulge in childlike activities.”?
I’m here to tell you...
The steps to success are really very simple. You need to know where you’re going, you have to know where you are, and you need to know how you’re going to get there. While some people get hung up on not being sure of where they want to go, that isn’t the major stumbling block. The issue most people have is their level of honesty they have with themselves regarding their current condition.
Let’s say you’re going on a trip to California (you know where you’re going), you tell yourself you’re in Michigan (where you are), and you come up with a map route that will get you there. Everything’s good, right? Wrong! Because you’re not really in Michigan, you’re in Massachusetts. Can you see how all your dreaming and planning are wasted because you’re not where you think you are?
What I’m talking about is called bias and each of us has this to some degree. Bias is a self-serving prejudice; it’s seeing...
For the first time since I started writing this blog, for the first time yesterday I realized there are two buttons at the top of the Add New Post window in the software I use to write this blog from my iPad, a Create button, and a Cancel button. I’ve used the Create button numerous times but just noticed the Cancel button yesterday. Every week I’ve made a choice to click on the Create button and share my thoughts and outlook with you. And then it struck me that this is how life is too.
Every day you get up you make a choice. You choose whether to click create and make your day or you click cancel and let your day be made for you. And as you combine these days, you end up with your life. Whether that life is a great life or a mediocre one is completely up to you. It’s your choice. You either drive ahead or drift around.
You’ve been given a gift that is unique to you that is meant to bless this world and make it a better place. You’ll never see your...
Remember when you were younger and thought you could do anything you wanted? You know what I’m talking about, where you were a rock star and the world was your stage. You loved life and were going to do great things regardless of what others told you because you knew you were infallible and invincible. Over time though something’s changed.
When did your thrill of adventure get replaced with your fear of losing what you have?
When did your love of everything new and exciting get replaced with comfort and routine?
Instead of being the rockstar you saw yourself as taking the world by storm, you’re now singing at weddings and bar mitzvahs. What happened? Life did. You allowed the defeats, obstacles, and challenges you ran into to limit what you believed you’re capable of. Now instead of waking up excited and ready to seize the day and make it yours, you get up and do what you did yesterday hoping that everything will stay the same just one more day. There’s...
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