JUST ONE THING
Social Media Dilemma
Episode 52
With Rick White, 180BIZ
Today I’ll talk about SMD. I will explain that in just a moment. I want you to realize two things today and I want you to bring this not only into this coming week. I want you to bring this to your team as well, because a lot of us are really having problems with this.
1. When someone famous passes away it's really sad. It truly it is. When someone that's gifted and has made a difference, such as actors, politicians, musicians, and people that have made a significant difference in the world. When they pass away, the media shows they call a highlight reel. This highlight reel talks about all their accomplishments and what they've done. It may show the awards they received, etc. That's really very cool, but that's only a small part of their lives. It’s just hitting the mountaintops of that lifespan.
This is a critical thought process to understand because they don't talk about the doubts and the fears and the depressions that those people may have gone through. It doesn’t show the the arguments, the demons they’ve battled of which they sometimes won and sometimes lost. The reality is some of the demons that we fight and each one of us has at least one, you never win the war. You can win a battle, but you never win the war. That demon is with you for your entire life, just like fear and doubt are. So, it's really important to understand that the highlight reel is not the example of a full life. It is the contributions they've made, but it is not their life.
The reason why I'm bringing that up is because we're talking about S M D, which means social media dilemma. People are looking at other people's posts and lives and thinking it's absolutely amazing. Their lives are so much better than mine. That's not true. It's a highlight reel. Understand that when you see the stuff in social media, it’s nothing more than a very long drawn out, highlight reel.
I'm thinking of a woman I recently saw, and I don't remember her name. She was a really nice, pretty young woman, and she had a lot of followers. She was a social media influencer. She recently committed suicide. You would think with all the cool things that were going on in her life, you couldn't understand why she would do that. But remember, you’re just getting the highlights.
2. We are creatures of comparison and contrast. That doesn't mean we want to be like everyone or have everything someone else has. It sometimes means that we want the opposite. There are some things that my mom and dad did as when I was growing up, not they did anything wrong, but I didn't like the way they did it. I wanted to do something different as a parent. I'm still using comparison and contrast. I'm comparing what I'm doing to theirs and wanting it to be different.
We're comparing things like driving an old car and they're driving a new one. And that makes me feel bad. Or look at those models on TV. They're so pretty and I'm not. Or I'm not as fit as that guy is. He's got a six pack.
We're comparing and contrasting all the time. We need to be aware of that because what we compare to, I truly believe, determines the happiness in our lives, the success of our businesses.
I was just at this big conference, STX 2022. There were other coaches there. I was talking to someone over the weekend, and they said, “Well, what do you think about this guy? What do you think about that guy? What about their business? They're your competitor. And I'm like, look, they're not my competitor.” We each have our own race to run. I don't pay any attention to those guys. I don't have the time. I've got too much on my plate to do. And I hope you can start to look at that the same way. Work on living your best life and becoming the best version of yourself.
I could compare my house, which is a nice house. I could compare my house to a mansion somewhere and realize that I don't have a pool. I don't have long dream lawn. But I do have a pasture and deer in my backyard. I have fox in my backyard and a creek going through it. But if I compare myself to that mansion, I'm going to feel like I have le. But if I go to Haiti or the Dominican Republic and I see the houses that are made out of cinder block or metal with no windows, I'm living in a castle.
The social media stuff isn't someone else's life. It’s just the highlights so that they don't get depressed or more depressed about what they're living. There are people killing themselves today because they're comparing themselves to other people on social media and that's a sin. It robs our joy. Mark Twain once said, “Comparison is the death of joy.”
Recognize that these two things, we are creatures of comparison and contrast. We do it all the time. That's okay. But be aware of it. Right? And then use it to your advantage, decide what you compare yourself to and you’ll be the happiest person in the world. I was walking around with a cane and people would comment that I was still so upbeat. They would ask how I could be so upbeat with a cane. I told them that they should have seen me with a walker. I see the cane as an improvement. These guys are seeing it as a detriment. It's like that young girl Bethany. Hamilton. Her arm got bit off by a shark. She lost her arm to a shark. And she's the happiest person in the world. Why? She says it’s because she still has the rest of her.
It's comparison that creates our joy. Use it wisely.
God bless. Take care. And go make some money.
