JUST ONE THING
Recognize the Stories that You're Telling Yourself
Episode 45
With Rick White, 180BIZ
I could talk all day about stories as human beings. There are not many things that are actually complete in our lives. In other words, we don't have complete information or a complete understanding of things. There are holes and gaps. We create stories to fill those gaps. But we also use stories to define how we see ourselves in the world and how we see ourselves interacting with the world.
When you're telling a story, there are four characters in the story. They are the villain, the victim, the hero, and the guide. You are playing one of those roles in the story that you're telling about your life. I want you to ask yourself a really simple question. Which character are you this morning?
I will give you a really simple way to show you how stories start. I will ask you a question and I want you to finish it with the first word that comes to mind. Life is… finish that sentence. Life is too short. Life is blessed. Life is amazing. Life's a bowl of cherries. Life is busy. That is what starts your story. Everything that you do starts your story right here. Life is… I will ask you another question. Finish this sentence. Business is… Your Business and Life sentences can be different. I hope you got this and they should be right. Business is a challenge. Business is overwhelming. Business is blessed. Business is stress. Business is a blessing or a curse, and it's true either way. Whatever story you start with is the start of how you show up.
It's never static. It's always dynamic. Most of the time. There are occasional outliers where business always sucks. Business or Life sucks. Here's the truth. Life is whatever you decide it's going to be. Life is a blessing. Life is a challenge. Now, how do I see this stuff? Once you have the definition, the meaning that you give to your business, your life, the relationship, my wife, my kids, my pets, my car, these are the start of your story. So, a lot of times we're playing the victim in the story. Why? Because something's happening. And we feel we have no control. And sometimes that's true. There are sometimes things that happen, situations, circumstances, and events that are outside of your control. And the mistake you make is trying to control them. I want you to hear that because this is a big deal.
The mistake you make is trying to control something you can't control. You can influence. Sometimes. In other words, if I wait till the day before my taxes are due, and then I have an issue with them, is that something I can control? No taxes come and go, but I can control how I show up. There are some things we have to learn to accept. That this is not the area that I should be pushing and trying to mold into the way I want it because I don't have that power. There are some things that happen that I have to accept. And then I can change how I show up.
Remember E plus R equals O? Event plus Response equals Outcome. The event isn't something I can change. I can change how I show up. I can be really bitter about it. And I can be the victim. Or I can step back and say, “Okay, this is going on. What can I do about it? How can I show up better? How can I show up differently?” Now we get a better story.
Recognize the stories that you're telling yourself. How do you figure that out? Life's not fair. You can't control situations, circumstances, and events. But what you can do is you can influence. You can influence by your actions. You can influence by how you show up. You can change how you show up. I have control of myself, but I can't control the events. I can influence other people. I hope I'm doing that today with you. I hope I'm getting you to step back for just a minute and realize that maybe your life isn't as bad as you feel it is right now. Yes, it is a challenge. Yes, it is a journey. But it’s all about how you show up. It's all about how you grow through these things. You're not supposed to go through them. You're not supposed to push through them. You're supposed to grow through them.
You want to come with me as you go through this year. We're already one 12th of the way through. I'm telling you the story you're telling yourself right now is going to determine how your year ends. If you are fighting an uphill battle, do you think you're going to win or lose? Do you think that if you see everything as something that's happening for you and not to you, do you think you'll end up in a different place, a better place? The answer is yes. Every obstacle, every challenge has the seed of greatness within it. There's a gift in every one of them of equal or better value. But we must be wise enough to step up, look at it, learn from it, and grow through it. What are the stories you're telling yourself? As business owners, watch your team. What are the stories they're telling themselves? Do you want to get some real growth out of your business? Get everyone on the same story and it will change your entire life. It's absolutely amazing. Remember, you are the author of your story. You get to decide. You are the one writing the story. You can change how it goes. You can find something that it means, something better, something more.
God, bless, stay safe, take care, and go make some money.
