Some of the truest things are said in movies and shows. In Star Trek: The Next Generation, the Borg famously state, “Resistance is futile”. I’ve been on an intense quest to better understand who I am today and who I want to become. I realize that the bridge between these two points is my ability to set goals, change my habits with ones that better serve me, and to discipline myself to consistently do the work. I’ve seen some successes and I’ve seen some disappointments. Last year I set a goal to lose 100 pounds. By September, I was down 60 pounds and then derailed myself and I’ve gained 40 of it back.
I’ve learned some lessons going through this that I know will help me ultimately succeed, not only on this goal but on any goal that I choose for myself that I’d like to share with you over the coming days. My hope is my lessons will help you to become and achieve whatever dreams you have. The best teacher isn’t experience, it’s other people’s experience.
The first lesson I’ve learned is that resistance is futile. There is a constant struggle at the beginning of creating new habits between the “I want it now brain” and the “I want it later brain”. Goal achievement is all about delayed gratification, focusing on my future reward over instant gratification or my desire to have something now. When I struggle with wanting something now, my natural tendency is to resist the urge to give in. The urge that feels good now, but ultimately derails and prolongs my ultimate desire for future achievement. And it’s a HUGE mistake!
I’ve found that resisting anything causes me to totally focus on the thing I don’t really want (okay, part of me does want it even though I realize I can’t be successful giving in). Want an example? Don’t think about an elephant. The more you try not to think about it, the more you think about it. It’s the same with resisting something your now brain wants. In this mode, I’m guaranteed to lose the battle, give in to the urge, prolong my achievement, and feel worse about me.
What I’ve found to be an amazing alternative is instead of resisting the urge, acknowledge it and then replace it. I know this sounds simple but it really works. So now when I want to eat the 2,000 calorie Cinnabon pastry, I recognize the urge and tell myself either, “Not now” or “Maybe later”. I then replace the urge with something else. This one simple tweak has helped me immensely. In a period of just two weeks, I’ve lost 8 pounds!
My number one goal is to become the best version of myself I can become physically, intellectually, and spiritually; to become the best husband, father, grandfather, son, brother, friend, and business person I am capable of being. I know you’re capable of so much more than you’re currently doing and I want to show you the power of setting goals, pushing forward, falling down, and constantly getting up to do it again can have on your life because I know how AMAZING you are!
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