Auto Repair Shop Owners are Curious to Make More MoneyDec 07, 2020
Curiosity Didn't Kill the Cat by Rick White, President 180BIZ
I want to start with a story that began a long, long time ago. And the main character in this story was a little you. Back then you went through certain experiences, you watched certain behaviors being modeled by those that you respected and influenced you like your mom and your dad and relatives and coaches and teachers. As you grew up, your experiences created a set of beliefs, too.
Our brain is constantly looking for ways to tie your experiences with pain and/or pleasure. So, if something bad happens, we try to figure it out and form a belief. Let me give you a quick example. Imagine that you are a little kid sitting on the kitchen counter and you fell off. AS you were falling you saw a green rug. You might think, “Wow, that green rug causes pain. If it happened twice and you saw that green rug, now you might start to associate the color green with pain. That is the strangeness of our beliefs. Because of this, I want you to constantly challenge your beliefs. You'll be amazed at the number of beliefs that aren't true and don't serve you. But don’t stop there, go beyond that.
Now imagine that the little you grew up and now you have a set of beliefs. You start your own business. And what happens when you are in a situation and you're dealing with somebody else? You unconsciously expect them to have the same belief system that you do. But not everyone does.
In the world today, people are realizing that not everyone has the same beliefs as we do. And we decide that those differing beliefs are wrong which is creating a divide in our society. That, in my opinion, is extremely dangerous. I believe there's more that unites us than divides us, but not part of our story.
You see, when you have beliefs, you have a bias. We have a tendency to hang out with people that believe the same way you do it. It doesn't make you right. It just confirms what you believe. That's why they call it a Confirmation Bias. I'm going into a little psychology here and I’ll be as quick as I can, but this is important. By hanging out with others who have the same beliefs as we do confirms our beliefs and makes them stronger.
Now when we meet someone with a different set of beliefs, we push against them. I’ll give you something different to think about. The easiest way to connect with somebody is to be curious. What is curiosity? Curiosity is having a life filled with wonder and questions. We can look at something and say, “Oh, that's a Rose” or, “Oh, that's an onion.” But you know something, you could spend your whole life studying that onion and not learn everything it has to teach you. But what we tend to do as human beings is once we label it, once we have a basic understanding of it, we tend to walk away.
Now, for any of you that have grandkids, you’ll be able to relate. My grandkids are a gift from God to help us get curious again. We get so stuck in our ways and covered with cobwebs. In their own way, grandkids take a figurative sledgehammer to our cobweb ways and really get us to see the world through their eyes. So, keeping that in mind, when you encounter someone that says something you may not agree with, instead of pushing back, ask why. Ask them why they feel that way. What has happened that brought about that thought process?
Curiosity will make the conversation about the other person. It's not about you, it's about them. And if you are genuinely curious, all you're there to do is understand and accept. If you grew up with a father and a mother that were present, like Leave It to Beaver parents, your picture of family life and your beliefs about family will be different from someone that grew up in a single-parent household. And maybe that single parent had some issues emotionally or physically or addictions or something to that effect. So now that family we're family of two, you might mean the world to them. It means nothing but pain. Understand and accept where they're at and what they're saying. Now, when you can do that, you’ll have the power of perspective.
You will better connect because you're making it about that person. They love talking about themselves. They will connect with you because you're genuinely curious. You may see life one way. They may see it in a different way. If you are curious, you get the gift of both perspectives. Now multiply that and your perspectives will grow. That perspective is power in business.
This is where some are afraid of being curious. They feel like if they accept these different beliefs they have to agree. Remember, we don't have to agree. We can agree to disagree. All we need to do is to understand and accept. It will help us to connect with each other. We will grow from the power of perspective, and we’ll be able to help and serve them so much better than just coming in and being focused on the car and their problems.
Understand that people are emotional beings. We are emotional beings and physical sacks. But we connect with people emotionally. When they come into your shop, they're emotional. Don't focus on the car, focus on them, focus on how they're feeling. It's going to make all the difference in the world.
Curiosity is a gift that we give ourselves. It allows us to not have to be right where we can learn from other people. It doesn't mean we have to agree with it. We do want to understand and accept it. Accept that it’s their reality. And it's okay. They don't have to have my reality, but this is going to help your business. That pressure to connect, build rapport, and all that sales stuff will come to you if you can just be curious.
Be curious this week and go make some money. God bless.