The Tugboat Trap: Why You’re Still Chasing Your Team

There’s a line I heard from Dan Martell, author of Buy Back Your Time, that got under my skin:

And the word I couldn’t stop thinking about wasn’t lighthouse.

It was tugboat.

Think about what a tugboat does. It hooks onto another ship and provides the power to move it. It steers it. It pushes it. It pulls it. It gets that ship where it needs to go.

That’s exactly what a tugboat is supposed to do.

The problem is, I think a lot of auto repair shop owners have become tugboats without even realizing it.

You’re reminding people. Checking on them. Chasing them. Solving their problems. Fixing what they didn’t finish.

Eventually, you’ve had enough and say, “You know what? Just give it to me. I’ll do it.”

Why Being the Tugboat Feels Like Good Leadership

Here’s what makes this so difficult: being a tugboat works.

The job gets done. The client gets called. The problem gets fixed. The deadline gets met.

So stepping in feels like good leadership.

But is it?

Most shop owners don’t wake up one morning and decide they’re going to do everybody else’s job. It happens a little bit at a time.

Someone isn’t quite ready, so you help. Something gets missed, so you remind them. They’re struggling with a problem, so you give them the answer. They make a mistake, so you fix it. They’re taking too long, so you step in.

Every one of those choices makes sense at the time because you’re trying to help.

But somewhere along the way, helping can turn into carrying. Then carrying turns into steering. Eventually, you become the power behind somebody else’s job.

Are You Giving Your Team a Chance to Take Ownership?

Before you get frustrated because your people aren’t taking ownership, there’s a question you need to ask yourself:

You can’t ask somebody to take ownership if you keep taking ownership back.

That’s where the other half of this idea matters.

If your job isn’t to pull the ship where it’s supposed to go, then your job is to be the lighthouse.

Your job is to guide.

And guiding your team comes down to three things:

1. Give Your Team Clear Direction

People need to know where they’re going.

What are we trying to do? What does good look like? What do you expect from them? What are they in charge of? How will they know whether they’re doing a good job?

That sounds simple, but think about how often you get upset because somebody didn’t do something the way you wanted it done.

Were you clear about what you wanted?

You can’t expect someone to stay on course if they don’t know where they’re going. You’ve got to make the way clear.

2. Be the Example You Expect Them to Follow

Guiding people isn’t just telling them where to go. You have to show them.

If you want your team to own their mistakes, you’ve got to own yours. If you want them prepared, you have to be prepared.

If you expect them to follow a process, don’t skip that process when you’re doing their job. If you expect them to keep their word, you’ve got to keep yours.

Your team watches what you do every moment of every day.

You can’t point people one way while you’re going another. Being the example is part of guiding.

3. Correct Your Team When They Get Off Course

Being a lighthouse doesn’t mean you point the way and then stop paying attention.

If someone gets off course, you say something. You give feedback. You coach. You ask questions. You deal with missed promises. You hold them accountable.

• Were you clear?
• Did they know how to do it?
• Did they have what they needed?
• Did something happen that they couldn’t control?
• Or did they know exactly what to do and simply not do it?

Guiding Your Team Doesn’t Mean Moving Them

This is the distinction I really want shop owners to understand.

I can show you where you’re going. I can show you how we’re going to act getting there. I can tell you when you’re getting off course. I can hold you accountable for getting back on course.

Guiding doesn’t mean moving somebody. The minute you start doing their part, something changes.

You aren’t helping them anymore. You’re pulling them. You’ve become the tugboat.

Sometimes you already know the answer. You can do it faster. You might even do it better. Stepping in feels like the quickest way to solve the problem.

But if you keep grabbing the wheel, when do they learn to steer?

The Tugboat Trap Works Today and Hurts You Tomorrow

This is why being a tugboat can be so hard to stop. It works today.

You remind them, and it gets done. You chase them, and eventually they do it. You fix it, and the problem goes away. You take it back, and suddenly you don’t have to worry about it anymore.

But what happens tomorrow?

They may learn that they don’t really have to remember because you’ll remind them. They may learn that you’ll check behind them, so they start relaxing more and more. They may learn that if they wait long enough, eventually you’re going to step in.

Helping isn’t the problem. Teaching isn’t the problem. Coaching isn’t the problem. Accountability isn’t the problem.

The problem is when your help becomes their power.

When they stop moving unless you’re pushing or pulling, you’ve become the tugboat.

Stop Pulling and Start Guiding

A lot of times, we create this situation because we’re afraid someone is going to make a mistake. We’re afraid to trust somebody.

The reality is that people earn trust over time by showing competence. Sometimes you need to train them. That’s okay.

But becoming the tugboat and pushing and pulling them wherever they need to go isn’t helping them.

Give them direction. Make sure they know where they’re going and what good looks like.

Set the example. Walk the talk and show them what you expect by the way you act.

Correct them when they get off course and hold them accountable.

If you have to keep reminding, chasing, fixing, carrying, and taking things back just to keep someone moving, you’re not leading anymore.

You’re towing them.

You can’t grow leaders if you can’t give them something to lead. You can’t grow responsibility if you’re not willing to let people be responsible.

Be clear. Communicate what you expect. Coach them. Correct them when necessary.

Then let them steer.